Rising Above Foolishness

Let’s take a moment to think about something really real. You've been there, haven’t you? That moment when you’re in a conversation—or maybe even an argument—with someone who just won’t listen. They’re not hearing what you’re saying, not because they don’t understand, but because they don’t want to. They’re stuck in their own way of thinking, and no matter how much truth you show them, no matter how many times you try to explain yourself, they just keep rejecting it. They dig their heels in deeper, and before you know it, you’re stuck in a battle that seems pointless. You’re trying to reason with them, but it’s like talking to a wall.

This is exactly what Proverbs 26:4 is talking about when it says, “Do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you yourself will be just like him.” On the surface, this may seem like simple advice—just don’t argue with fools. But when you really sit with it, it’s a much deeper message. It’s not just telling us to avoid arguments, it’s warning us not to let ourselves get dragged down to their level.

The Hebrew word for “fool” here is kesil (כְּסִיל), and it’s important to understand what that means. A kesil isn’t just someone who made a bad decision once or acted foolishly in a moment of weakness. No, the kesil is someone who has made foolishness their way of life. This person is so entrenched in their own stubbornness, so determined to reject wisdom and understanding, that they actively refuse to see the truth. They’re willfully blind to what’s right. It’s like trying to reason with someone who’s decided to live in denial, someone who has chosen foolishness as their default setting.

When we engage with someone who is in that space, someone who has hardened their heart and is stubbornly stuck in their ways, it’s easy for us to get frustrated and pulled into their mess. You know the feeling, right? You’re arguing with them, trying to make a point, and before long, you realize you’re just in the weeds, going in circles. You start saying things you don’t mean, acting in ways you wouldn’t normally act. You’re not trying to bring clarity anymore—you’re just caught up in the drama, and it’s wearing you out. Proverbs is warning us about exactly that: Don’t let their refusal to hear the truth drag you down to the point where you’re acting foolishly too.

It’s important to note that the word for “folly” in Proverbs 26:4 is ’evah (אֶוָה), meaning something twisted or perverse. It’s not just a fleeting foolish moment—it’s a whole mindset, a way of thinking that’s warped and out of alignment with wisdom. When the proverb says, “Don’t answer a fool according to his folly,” it’s telling us not to engage with that twisted thinking. If we do, we end up lowering ourselves to their level.

Solomon speaks about fools frequently in Proverbs. In 1:7, he says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools (again, kesil) despise wisdom and instruction.” The kesil doesn’t just not know better—they actively reject what they know is wise. This isn’t ignorance; it’s willful rebellion. And when we engage with them, we often end up feeling drained and frustrated, while they just keep on with their foolishness, unaffected by the truth we tried to share. Proverbs is warning us that these people aren’t looking for a conversation. They’re not open to correction; they’re looking for conflict.

So what happens when we try to reason with someone like this? We feed into their foolishness. They want us to argue with them, to get caught up in their nonsense. And when we do that, we find ourselves acting just like them. That’s why Proverbs tells us, “Do not answer a fool according to his folly.” It’s not about avoiding conflict—it’s about recognizing when it’s pointless and knowing when to protect your peace.

Jesus echoes this same principle in Matthew 7:6 when He says, “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet and turn and tear you to pieces.” At first, this may sound harsh, but the message is clear: Don’t waste your time and energy on people who won’t appreciate what you’re offering. Pearls are precious—they represent wisdom, truth, and the things that matter most. But if you give them to someone who’s not receptive, they’ll just trample them. Worse yet, they might even turn on you.

This connects perfectly with the warning in Proverbs 26:4. Some people are simply not going to hear you. That’s not to say we should never speak up or confront people, but we need to know when it’s pointless, when it’s just feeding into their foolishness. When that happens, it’s okay to step back. Silence isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom.

Proverbs 17:28 gives us an interesting insight into this: “Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues.” The wisdom of silence isn’t just about saying nothing—it’s about knowing when not to speak. Sometimes, the most powerful thing you can do is just not get involved in the drama. You don’t have to prove anything. You don’t have to win the argument. You trust that God will handle the situation in His time and in His way.

But when do we engage? Proverbs 9:8 says, “Do not rebuke mockers or they will hate you; rebuke the wise and they will love you.” The difference here is in the attitude of the person we’re dealing with. The mocker (Hebrew: lutz [לוּץ]) is someone who actively sneers at wisdom, someone who mocks correction. Engaging with them is pointless—they’ll just hate you for it. But the wise person, though they might not love correction in the moment, will recognize its value and ultimately appreciate it. So, while Proverbs tells us not to engage with mockers, it encourages us to speak truth to those who are open to it.

And how do we do that? We do it with humility, with a heart that reflects Christ. In 1 Peter 2:23, we read about Jesus’ example: “When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to Him who judges justly.” Jesus didn’t feel the need to defend Himself in every situation. He trusted that the Father would deal with it in His time. We’re called to do the same.

There’s a real freedom that comes from recognizing that not every fool needs a response. We can stop worrying about proving ourselves right and start focusing on what truly matters—being faithful to God’s call, living in wisdom, and trusting that God will take care of the rest.

I know it’s not easy. When someone is being unreasonable, or when you feel like you just have to set them straight, it’s tough. But when you pause and listen to the Holy Spirit, you realize that not every argument is worth winning. Sometimes, silence is the best response. When we stop engaging in every foolish conversation, we free ourselves from the drama. We stay focused on what’s truly important, and we trust that God will handle the rest.

How does that feel, diving into all of that? Do you see areas in your own life where this has played out, or maybe where it could be applied more?

I hope this message blessed you. If so, please leave a comment. I look forward to hearing from you.

The image is AI generated on chatgpt.